~The Reality Part~

You have been doing North Dakota for one year, 8 months one week and one day.

Whenever I go out, people ask me about you:  "are you still there?  Do You like it?  When will you be home? How long will you be home?  You must be making great money...right?"

I've noticed that men seem the most sympathetic when they say, "You must really miss him.  I know he must be missing all of you."

Women have more of a tendency to say things like, "It must be kind of nice when he is gone.  He is going to be home for TEN days?  I bet you will be glad to see him go."

The truth is, the way I feel when you leave has changed quite a bit over this journey.  The first few months, it was like agony watching you leave.  I walked around in your t-shirts and yoga pants, sad and lonely and physically ill.  At first, I often thought I would rather live in a trailer by the river with you, then in this nice house without you.

It took some time to realize the financial benefit to paying every bill every month, and to have left over money to catch a movie with the kids or buy a new shirt because it was on sale.

There were a few times when you came home growly and grumbly and fault finding and there were months when I was completely fine with you being gone.  I have always been happy to see you come home (mama's got needs that need to be met).  But there have been times when I was happy to see you go back.

This year has been a new phase--this year you are Mr Vacation and we are always looking forward to you coming home, and we are all always sad to see you go.

It isn't just the Cruise (best time of my life!) or the trips to Vegas or Missouri.  It isn't even over-nighters at the Fort or the nights at the cabin.  It's that when you are home you are taking care of things that need to be done and you are wonderful to be around.  You are laid back, funny, kind, sexy and you are getting the work done so we can go do something fun.

So, now you are like a man on vacation when you are home, and that is sublime.  It gives us all a vacation, even when we don't go anywhere.

When people ask me if I am secretly happy that you are gone NOW I tell them, "No, I miss him and I can't wait til he gets home."

I like this phase the best.  So far.